HE says SHE says

     It is a Friday. Exhausted I'm looking forward to a clean and happy weekend.  "Cleanliness is Next to Godliness" and for me "Uncleanliness is Next to Godzillaness". Mr.  Wallet is working infact working very hard at his task. His task??  To see to it that every corner of the bedroom is adorned by a torn paper or a wet towel or a charger or a smelly sock.  He just doesn't believe in limiting his abilities and in the best of his capacities spreads his wings to the living room. With the empty cups of tea at his desk,  the flies performing a Falguni Pathak garba at its rim. Dr. Mahendra Vatsa's page of Mirror is pushed between Mahendra Singh Dhoni's sports page.  As if the comrade of Sex and Sports in the country was not enough and this union of the two Mahendras was vital. The Idiot box blarrs in the background whereas its loyal audience is immersed in the Apple!!! 😾😾😾          If this is what you prefer to call h...

       "ATTENTION LADIES!! Work from the comfort of your home. Earn anywhere between 25k-50k/ month. No Investments. No Marketing. No Selling. Hurry! Interested ladies kindly WhatsApp on......" I did not bother to read the contact number as the Money number was far more lucrative. Just preventing my eyeballs from popping out, I rushed to Mr Wallet to show him this 'Screw My Future Add'. The pessimist he is, Mr Wallet redefines the add- " No Investment. No Marketing. No Selling. NO BRAINS Required!!!! Wow, Darling, this is just perfect for you! Your vestigial organ brain has not been asked for. As I say Jobs are made in Heaven, this is a heavenly opportunity for you. Isko laga dala toh life zingalala..... Go for it👍👍"          You people always blame me for being an angry cat purring at him. Now can your eyeballs see how this matchstick( nothing to do with his humble body type) sets me on fire? I had gone for Encouragement😇 and came back wi...

     Come the weekend and I become paranoid over socialising. On one such mediocre, totally middle-class Sunday morning, I am woken up by sounds of a broken down truck trying to make incessent efforts to revive. Hurriedly, sleepy eyed I look out of the window only to find the truck sleeping next to me!!😈😈         The vocal chords are making genuine efforts to match up with the flute played by the nostrils. The wide open mouth adds zing to the opera been played here. I marvel at body's physiology how the snoring person is never disturbed by his own musical extravaganza. Deeper the level of sleep, higher is the note sung. Higher the note sung, darker go my dark circles. I can no longer tolerate this apathy. The truck just rolls over to start another symphony of Beenthoven. Wondering if snoring can be considered as a valid reason for filing a case of harassment against Mr. Wallet.                  The waters ...